Monday, January 07, 2008

National Treasure On Top For THIRD Straight Week At The Box Office, God Threatens Retirement

"Respectable acting career's gotta be in here somewhere..."

Another week, another first place finish for Disney and Nicolas Cage with National Treasure: Book of Secrets! The Mensa fest held on to the top spot at the box office this weekend with an estimated $20.2M Giving the film an overall $171M take and cementing it's place as a true testament to the mind numbing stupidity of filmgoers across the country.

The Almighty: Not a happy camper at all.

The surprisingly strong showing has elicited a response from the Almighty himself who claimed: "Oh come on, you gotta be kidding me! Three weeks? How did I let that happen?" he then went on to say "Floods have ravaged villages and famine has devestated continents but come on, help me out people it''s stupid! The frickin' thing is just stupid...Chuck Heston making water part is a stretch but your "founding fathers" having the foresight to hide treasure all over the country? Your "founding fathers" were too busy stealing land and making mulatto babies with their slaves...come on! This happens again I'm outta here...swear to frickin' me, I'm gone. Then we'll see how you like it!"

With Cloverfield not opening for another week, the All Powerful may be headed for some downtime.

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